Validate Your Life

I was on a live coaching conference call talking about different brain changes and patterns with some other coaches and I thought about the prospect of sharing a personal story.  We were discussing how adolescents can sometimes be sensitized to things that other people may deem as unproblematic, like, for example, not having someone to sit with for lunch.  Yikes!  I instantly communicated the effect of delivering a bit of personal history with the purpose of galvanizing the conversation, session, and communication.  On the topic of offering personal anecdotes….ANYWHERE!

• in coaching
• in consulting
• in friendship(s)
• in conversations
• in romance-seduction
• in rapport-building
• in relationships with anyone!

I propounded ever-so eloquently if I do say so myself that offering a personal story could be helpful for four good reasons.  A personal anecdote can: (more…)

Top Reasons Why People Find it Difficult to Let go of Hurtful People

• Fear of Rejection
• Strange, but true. Fearing to cross someone off your list means you somewhat fear rejection from others. Don’t ever fear rejection; you must interpret everything merely as feedback!
• Fear of People Attacking Back
• You may fear people retaliating. For me I feared the people cutting off financial support, supplies, and “material things”.
• Fear of New Behavioral
• Old habits die hard. Period.
• Top Most inefficient ways that People Exclude what They Don’t Want
• A lot of this works subconsciously….
• Do things to make them unattractive.
• Outrageously insane, but, yes, true. Some people gain weight, tarnish their image, purposely (subconsciously) look disheveled to “repel” people and things they don’t like, but don’t know how to exclude.
• Punish themselves

Yep the old, “it’s my fault” line creates a lot problems.
Get out of their mind and into yours. Your mind is a colorful, alive, limitless place – trust me, you want to go there!
Every people-decision in life opens a door and closes another. YOUR spirit and existence would benefit greatly to manufacture precise actions that open the door of Welcoming of exhilaration, romance, joy, jubilation, honesty, clarity, and quality, precision, freedom, strength, and grace, while closing the door of Misery of repulsive vilifications, confusion, frustration, angst, and pain. So many of us close the Welcoming door and open the Misery door. Don’t do that! You either welcome the right, good, quality people and events into your life that make you feel sincere, calm, and energized and feel warmth from the world, or you let in the infectious people, situations, things, and habits that taint your worldly perspective obfuscating your weltanschauung with bleak misery. Your interpretation of the zeitgeist reflects whom you welcome or do not welcome into your life. Do not even give yourself the choice to not close Misery doors and open Welcoming doors of genuineness. Just develop an instinctively intrinsic validation system to always slam shut the Misery door and fling open the Welcoming door.
This sounds simple, but, often the simplest things need the most alignment.
Let me know if you think this sounds too harsh, haughty, or haranguing, or if you have related ideas.

(Modified-Reconstructed 2007 Post).

Here’s  the Translations of the fields of study that I eliminated to their present and future and these may likely slightly fluctuate but meh.

I’ve evolved my past 5 studies to more uplifting, validating, clarifying studies.  The transduction are as follows:

• Psychology —> Video Games!  Simply the opposite of psychology. Instead of imprisoning one self with self-dialogue “snares” , actually just doing things in a game or real world.  Escaping prison of mind.  This one’s complex and I fully don’t understand it honestly, but it’s something along the lines of gamers are a community, they’re a niche (or “we” are a niche really).  We help each other out.  Friends are the best shrinks, psychologists, coaches in teh world and better. So gamers are friends, thus gaming (via the community of gamers) eclipses psychology completely, replacing it with something progressive, fun, cooperative, exciting as, and full of tons of free expression within the uplifting confines of a great game.  There’s room for passion and interacting but always the forward-moving, measurable progression in game.  Both those (the progress and passion) create massive clarity and peace.  This sounds a bit “zen huey-looey” but hey, I reckon I take gaming seriously.  I’m serious enough about it and the gaming community to recognize that hte best “therapy” one could ever provide or receive occured with mates!  Heck, I even consoled a mate about his dad’s cancer on vent once!  Bloody hell! I don’t expect gaming community to be that intense, but video games are moving in the right direction: involved, not paralyzed behind a 4th wall, and not to mention fun and structured.  Most of all, I LIKE video games!  I get charged with a group of gamers cooperatively working together in a player verse player basis to meet a goal that can only be ascertained with such cooperation!  Rockin’ good time!
• Computers —>  Neuroscience and Mnemonics and NLP and a few “conditionals” to conduct social interactions.  Utilizing the mind with it’s far-more-advanced technology than a computer as if it were a computer that’s always with you! Mnemonics has been a massively reoccurring interest in my life.  I studied it extensively after returning from my trip in the Mexico Yucatan in 2002.  I had the lobes of the brain on my desktop throughout college (this is also because my computer(s) basically are my brain(s) haha!), and NLP can create some aligning visualizations and NLP is great for anti-persuasion, so I only make choices that are keyed in with what I want and need not because someone else is effective at sales or persuading me off center.  NLP has some interesting hypnosis trance stuff which I may be trying to avoid but at least learning about it is effective.  The computer science moving towards social behavior deserves some explanation.  In fact all of these transmutations, uncertainly deserve more explanation, but hey, one step at a time.  Using computer science for social conditionals would mean setting up, for example, and if statement so that:
  • if (xyz_conditional) {
  • do_abc_expression;
  • }
  • which would conduct and organize my social interactions producing more flow, greater ease, heightened simplicity, and less anxiety because it’s all “programmed”!  This could be imprisoning in once sense, but when you’re constantly worried about what to say or do, this creates a very stabilizing ease.  Excellent!
• Drama        —> Music, namely classical, and Math.  ufoMathematical, auditory, some music has “performance” but is so much more precise, it makes drama look like sludge.  A comparison I think would be a commercial is to drama as a great feature film i to music.  That aside, some talented performers are very musical in their performance even if labeled “drama”.  Drama, especially with Eric Berne’s “drama triangles” with social “transactions” is the exact rubbish that I am moving away from.  Perpetually hold the adult title and discard the time-consuming and confusing states of stagnation and stuckness that produce quagmires of social confusion.  Math and classical music are the respective left and right brains of crispness and clarity. Quality times.
• English       —-> Voice work.  Not stuck trapped communicating through keyboard-pecking and expressing self though voice but WITH the structured composition learned from writing is marvelous and unquestionably an advancement.  I just spent about an hour photographing for digital archive, my book…that I wrote…that was basically notes on self-help book rubbish…and (it was called Validate Your Life) and get this utter blithering insanity…I actually took notes and highlights and bloody MARGIN comments on my own book!  So I photo-scanned all that in and put all the crumpled paper in a bag to burn, discard or just rummage through for remembering of how pathetically stuck my life was in the past withe self-help rubbish and religion infecting my thoughts! Math, anatomy, games, all of these new transmutations have revealed to me that illusion spell I was under in writing that self-help rubbish which was just regurgitated self-help rubbish I had previously read.
• Politics        —> Honesty and Journal-writing and Sharing!  Additionally possibly aquatic, swimming workouts, health.   The antithesis of politics.  My goal is not to be invulnerable, but vulnerability makes you incredibly solid and strong and connected.  To quote an unsophisticated source, Ferguson says “if you’re honest, you’re bullet-proof”.  I’m interested imperfection.  Conveying my faults, my problems, my confusions, my anxieties.  That’s being real for me and that leaves politics in a pathetic useless mangled dusty pile of rubbish.  Journaling and sharing that is clarity.  Also I know a lot of aquatic fun is tied in with these transmutations.  Maybe swimming and aquatic snorkeling and whatnot would be the antithesis of politics because there’s absolutely no red-tape (assuming you’re allowed to swim where you can) and there’s no political sticky rubbish.

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Going all Vegan with Intellectual Subjects

I LOVE Eating Vegan.  So much more digestive time for the foods I enjoy, savor, and that are healthiest. Best of all, nothing I eat feels heavy or burdensome.

I remember my brothers (both whom of which are also vegan but are so because of animal rights reasons) asking me what compelled me to go vegan. For me, the animal rights, the better for the environment, all those reasons are dandy, but for me it just plain out felt better.  Even when I drank a glass of milk I remember saying “it felt like an invasion of crap!”.  And I felt as though I had to wait for that to digest.

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Dear Governor Schwarzenneger,

(From John Thomas “Kooz” Kuczmarski)

I’m a strong believer that the purpose of a city should serve Nature. Nature — wildlife, animals, we homo sapiens ARE Nature — should be the intention of anything municipal, or city-based. Therefore the idea of actually closing beaches, closing a way for humans to enjoy nature (the ocean and beaches) would be undermining the very purpose of a city.

Do you really think people will stand for not being able to access beaches? Have you any idea how ludicrous that sounds?

I think anyone who believes eliminating parks-nature-Beach funding for the purpose of redirecting those funds to something non-Nature-based needs to re-evaluate their mission, don’t you?

If the significance of Nature (the oxygen we breath from the botanical plants of parks) and the body of water that keeps us alive (planet earth ecologically could not survive if it were not for it being covered with over 70% water) is eclipsed, all is lost for EARTH and humans. This sounds extreme and that’s because it is. If anything, funding needs to be redirected to opening MORE beaches and parks to remind us homo sapiens that we are just highly-evolved primates, elements of nature and truly do deserve to connect with Nature readily and frequently.

I think one problem with American government is that it HAS too much funding!! IT has so much funding that it redirects it’s energies, finances, and time away from the absolute necessities (nature, oxygen, planetary perpetuation and survival).

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In the business, professional, internet, or any world with which you associate yourself. Professionalism, formality, closure and safety are all important. Read on to see why contracts move goals forward!

1. Formality. It adds to the REALNESS of the coaching relationship for BOTH the client and coach. As a coach I don’t want some client joking around wasting my time if they aren’t committed to changing. I take coaching VERY seriously. I’ve deliberately started and stopped smoking for 2 month segments specifically for the purpose of learning about the addiction so I could educate myself on how to help clients break it! I take coachign incredibly seriously and I need clients that are committed to changing as well! From the Client POV, I’m sure a sincere and focused client who’ serious about achieving his/her goals WANTS a serious coach who’s determined to make them realize their goals and potential!! A contract creates this formality to the coaching-client relationship.

2. Closure. A contract creates closure and certainty on the duration of the coaching. This is ESSENTIAL for goal-setting because it shows the coach and client how fast they ahve to move and what they will have time to cover or not. If the coach and client only have 2 coachign sessions, they’ll most certainly have to focus on different things than if they had 10 coaching sessions. A contract creates closure.

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Buying in bulk solves three problems very vital problems in life. Buying in bulk boost finances, is healthy from a temporal-sentient point of view, and keeps our planet cleaner and less polluted. Oh, you don’t understand how did my mental-math? I’ll show my work:

1. Saving money. Anyway you cut it, whether it be bulk salmon or bulk soap, purchasing in bulk means less marketing costs for the individual items and a closer to wholesale price which means less expensive, and more mullah (that stays) for your pocket!
2. Saving Time. Buying bulk decreases the amount of times you have to go to the store and purchase refills. It’s a hassle to have to write “buy more hand soap” on a grocery list, what? maybe 6-7 times per year if you go through one of those every 1-2 months?! Well, with bulk, you write “buy more xyz” as little as once per year, and food items as infrequently as once per month! Most of my soaps, and cleaners (with the exception of bleach and ammonia, because I go through those quickly but they’re extremely cheap) I buy in huge large quantities and seriously, laundry detergent and dishwasher detergent (I wash a lot of my own dishes and ration out the laundry detergent well) for example, last me a year. That’s just a huge relief either way, to only have to worry about buying laundry detergent or dishwasher detergent ONCE a year (or more likely ONCE every two years)?! That’s awesome. We have 365 days per year. What are some other cool creative, successful things you could be doing with your time now that you don’t have to go to the grocery store for almost any kind of cleaning supply for the entire year?!! That’s just rad! Here’s a mini list of the items I buy in bulk
   • Handsoap (1x/year)
   • Dishwasher soap (1x/1-2year)
   • Laundry Detergent (1x/1-2year). Yes, the same thing of laundry detergent and soap has lasted me almost two years!
   • Toilet cleaner (1x/year)
   • Fish (1x/1-5month). (I freeze all my fish so you can easily buy a ton in bulk and freeze it for 5 months and if you get canned tuna, that can go for 6 mo. easily).
   • Vegetables (1x/month)
   • Cheese (2-4x/year). I’m dead serious. I freeze all the cheese and when I packet is gone in the fridge, just chuck one in the dairy bin from the freezer. You buy in bulk, you can buy cheese sooo infrequently but always have a ton.
   • Pasta (2x/year. I’m dead serious. You buy bulk pasta and even if you eat a lot of pasta, you only have to buy it twice per year!)
3. Saving the Environment. Buying in bulk is a direct enterprise in helping the environment because buying in bulk means less purchases which means less left over bottles and plastic wrappers simply because you’ll be purchasing less plastic bottles and plastic wrapper and marketing packaging, and less plastic containers. Read up on the HORRIFYING Pacific Trash Vortex to fully understand the global wide “too much trash” problem. Basically, we’re pumping so much plastic wrapper and bottle refuse into our ocean. Seriously. Seriously. How f$@ked up is that?! Couldn’t we re-use our bottles instead of litterally pumping them into our ocean water?! The disgusting physiological ramification of this is mini fish eat the mini shreds of plastic, bigger fish eat the mini fish, we eat the bigger fish and therefor consume plaste. Read up on the PTV, it’s nasty, very real, and very frigthening stuff; I’m becoming very interested at the very least informing myself of that problem and I donate toa charity that helps solve it. So, but buying in bulk, you purchase one huge one huge container that you can likely reuse and that saves the environment, the ocean, and our planet!
4. *Saving you from Disorganization. My little bonus perk idea. May not work for everyone, but truly works for me! This one seems like an odd ramification, but truly, I reuse over 50% of the bottles and containers I get that are “wrappers” typically discarded after opening something or using something for 1)organization, 2)environmenal safety and 3)cheaper. Some of the containers that contain products are as sturdy and useful as one you’d spend $14.99 on at the Container Store! True!. I’m an organizational freak so buying in bulk works toward this end, too!

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I think one thing going on in life is that I’m discovering what systems and methods work for me. And career is part of this.

This is a reference to

1. Organization systems — the literally dozen and dozens (over 50 easily) organizational system methods for emails, todos, phonecalls and life, and none of the systems work, but I’ve created one that works for me
2. Diets — Again, found what works best for me after an exhausting and disturbing trial of fallacious food products and things that don’t work. Again, for me personally, i’ve discovered simplest is best. I cook and make almost all my own food. Because 1) it’s one of the few things I can afford, 2)food you make tastes better and 3)it’s usually better for you because you avoid prepackaged crap and make more wholesome meals.
3. Exercise routines – when I go to the Gym I see people doing really stupid things with weights, really intelligent things, poor endurance programs, top-notch cardio circuits — the whole gamut. Each one works or doesn’t work for people.
4. Errands — I have to use lists. I have electronic organizers on my phone to get things done. To some people it would drive them insane having lists of things to remind them what to get or do when they go out, but for me it’s freedom and makes my life easier. Again, we have to honor our own system.

Everyone works out differently and everyone has their own unique style and approach. That must be respected. Respected not to “honor their individuality” but rather to honor your own. And to acknowledge the fact that because some person gets jacked doing one thing and is healthy doing xyz diet and is on top of their game with abc organizational system, does not mean that you’ll be jacked, healthy, and organized with their system.

Part of life is discovering how you work and what’s the best method and system and concourse of health and organization and exercise for you with your unique goals, dreams, fears, problems, and certainties, and then how to optimize interaction with others and co-existance with others despite these large differences.

Finally, the best article on (anti) Christianity that I needed to read to reaffirm my new intentions, emerging beliefs, and values (Basically I’ve realized that all religions are just clever cult-worshipping myths. They’re just elaborate myths, fables. Jesus isn’t any different from the Hare in the tortoise and the hair or Buddha isn’t any different from Prometheus (the god of fire from ancient greece). Religions are myths. They are not true. Jesus, Buddha, Allah…they never existed. That however is not condemning hope and faith. Hope and faith are very strong great things and MANY myths teach the lessons of hope, faith, discipline, etc. Religion is merely a myth. It’s astonishing how BLIND so many people are in regards to how obvious it is that those figureheads truly did not exist, but they blindly go on believing…people that easily duped (i.e. devout christians) are frankly quite frightening because if they could be deluded into believing that a mythological figure like Jesus had as much evidence for existing as Paul Bunyan (see this great article on that) then…wow.

I’m beginning to see how the working world works. How people invent products that are completely useless, copying various competitor brands, when always the simplest (and cheapest) is always the best. The simple best cheapest products stand out on a store shelf. Example: I went to go pick up dog shampoo. I knew the only thing I need for my awesome dog is 2 bowls (1 for food, 1 for water), huge bag of food, a deshedding brush, and doggie shampoo. SCREW all of those mini expensive toy, chemical, brushy, foofy, petty products; they’re ALL scams to make money! And the store-brand (generic) bottle of doggy shampoo is like “glistening” on the shelf, it’s by Far the best one!! Largest quantity, cheapest price, vanilla cent, does the EXACT same thing as all the other “designer” (designer dog shampoo OMG!! ffs!) shiny coat, oiled, good dermatologically, etc. The simplest, cheapest, and minimal items are ALWAYS the best. It’s so easy to get lost and confused in the world of “brand”. Of buying something not for it’s purpose nor utility but it’s brand. Such a concept is utterly ridiculous to me now! Now, don’t get me wrong their are some brands that I use because I invest a lot of time into a certain resource; namely Apple brand computers and mabye Shell gas just because of good experiences from those stations, but other than that, NOTHING else really should be brand-bought! Even food, beverages, household items I always go to the cheapest bulk, “generic” label brands 1)because I don’t have the option of affording another kind and 2)because it’s Liberating!! To know that I didn’t waste money on a packaging configuration of brand letters!! The intent with providing a solid brand is to ensure consistency and reliability, but you know what? The generic simplest naturalist product (be it strawberries or shampoo) is almost always the best, especially if it’s something you need that isn’t an everyday thing.

So as I passed these rows and rows and rows of trinketty ridiculous pet items, all your canus lupus needs to be happy is good, fun exercise outdoors, social play time with other animals (including homo sapiens), food, water, and staying clean/bathed! But I thought to myself, I could’ve been one of those people that invented a product and went through the HELL of branding and patenting paperwork and approvals, just to get my mini row of 10 or so identical invention items up on the shelf…NEXT TO 2-10 other types of competitor inventions that emerge with their own marketing advertising, labeling, twist angle just to make money! So I feel galvanized having chosen to just take a deep breath, pass by all that superfluous shit, grab the simplest, cheapest product, and not clutter my life with items that have little bearing on a person. I purchase items for utility (or if it’s an investment, to sell later, but that’s a different strategy); that makes me feel resourceful!

Purchasing the generic brand encourages creativity and modularity. This may sound ridiculously complex and unnecessarily over-scrutinized, but it’s undeniably true! When I purchase generic “no-brand” cereal or vegetables, or rice, for example, I find it joyful to then resourcefully plugin interesting recipes to make that “bland no brand” extremely tasty or resourceful and exciting. It makes you feel self-sufficient to make things, construct things you need (if possible) instead of going to go purchase them. The experience of self-sufficiency of creating what you need if you have the necessary components (some things items like basic food ingredients feel good to purchase) to just make the tool or implement feels extremely rewarding, soothing, and confidence-boosting!

Basically what you’re going through is changing your life program. Everyone has a life prgram — a series of steps and procedures, strategies, and environmental cues that make what they do simpler, easier, and feel more productive. I remember doing some work for a comedy club in North Hollywood. I planned to make some calls to invite more people to the club. To do that I had access to the back office which cut through the kitchen, where I could see the chef at work. Now the chef had all of his ingredients laid out. He happily rolled some kind of tortilla while he had multiple burners cooking food. You could tell his life program was comfortable cooking. He could and did crunch out 40-50 full meals that evening and he did it simply, smoothly, and in a way that felt like he was getting stuff done. An hour later after making the calls I watched the comedian on stage. You could tell, by how relaxed he was, but simultaneously confident, and happy he looked on stage making people life with his set material, that he had manufactured a life program that enabled him to feel comfortale on stage telling jokes and making people laugh!

We all have these life programs — a sequence of steps, procedures, environmental cues, stimuli, and internal responses combined with techniques and strategies — that make something feel natural, simple productive and exciting! The trick is to learn what makes one life program work and apply those same qualities and strategies to another task (like if the comedian had to work in the kitchen, I’m sure he’d use similar strategies of engaging other chefs to learn what to do or if the chef had to work as a comedian, he may have a procedural approach that he hused preparing meals and dishes to presenting his material!)

If it sounds like you’re interested in shifting from a life program of continuing to be able crisply, clearly, and actively provide help to your clients during your business appointments but to additionally add-in the capacity to have that same crisp, clear, focused, helpful problem-solving state where you know what to do and how to do it with your own challenges and tasks for your own personal (organizing, earning, and building muscle health) life, send us an email! We’re here to help install that change!

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Basically this specific part is messy and infected with a lot of David Allen’s GTD muck. Frankly GTD is too bloated of an organizational system; you take on a lot of crap you don’t need if you use it. It has some great concepts but as a whole the system sucks. So I’m on the process of writing up details of my own system. For computers, it basically uses all online documents, almost all documents on hard drives are backups. It consolidates consolidates consolidates!! All like files. It gets all your outcome project files in one spot. My system really works, and it goes where GTD failed to go and takes you to place where you end up just jotting stuff down you need to do and doing it instead of all this WF, M-S (when the frickin hell am I ever going to look at a maybe-someday list to see what I maybe someday will do? That list is a bunch of crap), crap it just has a simple todos projects and you don’t need seperate folders for project,s that’s like kids r’ us. I have one online file accessible from my phone, laptop, or desktoop that has things to do and if it’s complex, an outline of how to accomplish it all in THE SAME ONE FILE. The file is organized into “computer” “videos” “books” projects because all outside tasks I keep on a ZenBe lists. So yeah, basically what i wrote last year is practically 80% obsolete and the new organizational system is much clearer, sharper, and most important — SIMPLER!

“A state is our way of being in any moment It comes from our physiology.
thinking and emotions, and is greater than the sum of its parts. We
experience states from the inside, but they have external markers that can
be measured from the outside, like a particular frequency of brain waves,
pulse rate, etc. But none of these can tell you what it is like to feel angry
or to be in love. “
Oconnor.
SOOOO TRue. so awesome!!! OMG so helpful.

My baseline state changed in 00 (after meeting the devil worshipper bitch maya). Before I had different energy level, different representational system. My newer state became more chaotic. I held different values; predominant emotion of anger or so! I am blue energy (knowing what’s up with people emotionally, highly emotionally, easily overwhelmed a bit) so definitely good to stay connected with personal history, journals, etc!

GREAT general rule. Experience pleasant memories in associated experience to get the most out of them, and unpleasant memories in dissociated state to avoid bad/unpleasant feelings and to avoid getting overwhelmed. COOL. This is like a protector or integrater. If you’re in life and feel overwhelmed,just pop into dissociated state! If you’re doing something and you realize “hey, this experience rocks!” pop into an associated state to soak it up and get all the good emotions to generate a more uplifted state!